Let’s Read About Sex:
Books to Help with ‘The Talk’
by Denise Schipani
I have a deal with my husband: He digs into the sex talk(s) with our sons, and I’ll do everything else. Okay, so it isn’t so much a deal as a vain wish. I wish, in fact, that I didn’t have to have these talks at all. But I know that I do, and in fact, I value what’s been, so far, a nicely open relationship with my sons. They’ve asked questions, and I’ve answered them all, calmly and (I hope) clearly, and I want that to continue. They already know how babies grow inside women, and how they get out (a bit of info that elicited a sharp, “I’m so glad I’m not a girl!”), but so far no one’s asked, specifically, how babies get in there to begin with. I think I may need a little help. Which is — as usual — where books come in.
We gathered up sex-talk book recommendations appropriate whether you’ve got a kindergartner or a teen about to head off to college.
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For Younger Kids:
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The Baby Tree
Available from:Some tots, when their moms are pregnant again, ask hardly a single question. Others? Well, they need this book, which offers an engagingly illustrated, age-appropriate answer to the perpetual question: Where do babies come from?
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It’s Not the Stork!
Available from:You might have to start by explaining what the stork story even is, but once you dispatch that tired myth, Harris’s book gives parents of the kindergarten to third grade-ish set clear info on body parts, physical love, and the difference between “OK touching” and “not OK touching.”
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For Tweens:
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Sex is a Funny Word
Available from:The title gets it right: If you’re an 8- to 10-year-old, it is funny. If you believe a comic-book take on the sex talk isn’t serious enough, think of it from your tween’s perspective. This answers the essential questions without resorting to health-class slide-show stuff you might remember, and covers issues of boundaries and safety.
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It’s Perfectly Normal: Changing Bodies, Growing Up, Sex, and Sexual Health
It’s Perfectly Normal — just the title is comforting, right? Because at the root of nearly every question your pre-teen has about sex and his or her changing body (changes that often feel like a betrayal) is the “normal” query. This book, universally praised by parents in the know, strikes that reassuring and knowledgeable tone you wish you just naturally had.
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American Medical Association Boy’s (or Girl’s) Guide to Becoming a Teen
That AMA imprimatur gives parents reason to trust this easy-to-read book, perfect if you have a child who’d rather grab the book and run off to his or her room to read solo.
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For Teens:
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Sex: A Book for Teens: An Uncensored Guide to Your Body, Sex, and Safety
Uncensored is right: This book is best for parents of teens who are already sexually active and need some straight-talk information about … well, you name it.
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S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Progressive Sexuality Guide to Get You Through High School and College
Ironic, isn’t it? The “is this normal?” question never really goes away. Corinna helps questioning (and sexually active) older teens wrestle with questions of homo- and bisexuality, navigating sexual relationships, and much (much) more.